Number Seven

“Thou shalt not commit adultery.” Exodus 20:14

None of the commandments brings with it such notoriety among church people as this one. This particular topic is avoided in the most creative ways by the church, and in so doing many lives are left in ruins. The term adultery is understood as ‘sexual relations of a married person outside of his or her marriage’. However, when taking the Biblical perspective this commandment encompasses any intimate relationship outside the covenant of marriage. Clearly if we love we will not dishonour our marriage – before or after it occurs – our bodies – which is the temple of God (1Corinthians 3:16) – or our God because He created marriage for our benefit and for us to experience the oneness of love that exists in the Godhead. There are many ways and countless reasons why we fall short of this command, I will address a few that may or may not have crossed your mind.

Fornication – the detriment of countless young lives and the subversive rot of many marriages – unlawful sexual relationships before marriage. Engaging in premarital sexual activity is taken extremely lightly in our current society whether in secular or religious communities. Human beings were designed to pair up and engage in sexual activity. God himself said ‘it is not good for man to be alone’ (Genesis 2:18, 23-25) and when He created a partner for the man He instructed them to ‘be fruitful and multiply’ (Genesis 1:28). However, with everything good that God created the devil has seen fit to corrupt it. The natural desire, to share one’s life with another, that God has given to us as human beings, the devil has inspired us to act on outside the intended context. We convert the fulfillment of these natural desires into gods in the place of the one true God. Therefore, by transferring the focus we should have in developing a relationship with our Creator, to satisfying our need for companionship or our physical urges, we convert what is to be a loving relationship into lustful encounters.

Many theologians speculate as to Adam’s motives for eating the fruit, saying that ‘he loved Eve so much that he gave up paradise for her’. If we study this scenario fully we will know that his act was not out of true love for her. God instructed them that if they ate of the tree they would die (Genesis 2:17). If Adam was acting out of true love his priorities would have been straight and obedience to God’s instructions would have been paramount in his course of action. Adam acted out of lust and self-interest. He prioritized the gift rather than the God who gave the gift. Similarly, we prioritize companionship over the God that designed companionship, to our own detriment. A relationship formed without the foundation of love for God will not last. Because of the nature of the sinful human heart (Jeremiah 17:9) the only reliable aspect of any human relationship is when it is rooted and grounded in a love for our Creator. Without allegiance to God we end up with hurt feelings, broken hearts, disrespect, abuse, broken marriages and damaged children, who without Christ, end up repeating the cycle.

Divorce is yet another outgrowth of disrespect for the marriage covenant. It may be caused by adultery or it may result in adultery. Marriage was designed by God to be life-long (Mark 10:9). Therefore, it should not be entered into lightly. Fervent prayer, study and a humble spirit are vital before making this commitment. Many, because of a need to fulfill selfish desires, haughtily enter marriage not understanding the idea of becoming “one flesh” (Genesis 2:24; Matthew 19:5, 6). The scriptures instruct us not to attach ourselves to people that are not like-minded (Amos 3:3; 2 Corinthians 6:14). However, we obstinately rush on, marrying individuals that don’t share our beliefs about spiritual, mental or physical life. Then, the honeymoon ends and steady stream of little quarrels begin. Some escape this “living nightmare” physically by leaving or engaging in adulterous relationships. Others choose the mental escape encouraging friendships with someone who “shares” his or her spiritual, mental and physical life values. This too is adulterous. Sharing intimate thoughts outside your marriage is just as hurtful and damaging as sharing sexual acts outside the marriage and many times leads to physical infidelity.

Most professed God-fearing individuals declare proudly that adultery is an acceptable excuse for divorce citing Matthew 19:9. This is true adultery is the only “sanctioned” reason for divorce, however, we tend to skip over verse 8; which emphasizes the point that divorce is not a part of God’s plan and the only reason Moses allowed it was because of the ‘hardness of our hearts’. Now, as God-fearing heaven-goaled individuals, are we really to engage in something that appeases a hardened heart? I heard a sermon once in which the term contract and covenant were contrasted. In a contract if one party breaks their side of the agreement the contract is voided. However, in a covenant if one party breaks their vow the agreement remains and a remedy can be agreed upon to recover the covenant. In our society we treat marriage as a contract, the solemnity is lost and genuine commitment is gone. We only engage in it for what we can get out of it and when we feel slighted we escape. But the escape is never good because separating what was once “one flesh” will always cause damage and leave scars. Furthermore, we learn from Christ’s words that remarriage after a divorce is adultery (Matthew 5:32; 19:9; Mark 10:11, 12). It would behove us to think cautiously before embarking on these relationships.

With the understanding that intimate relationships outside marriage is adultery; and the knowledge that marriage is the union of one man and one woman (Mark 10:6-9) then what of homosexual relationships? This is clearly in opposition to the seventh commandment. This form of aberrant relationship is diametrically opposed to God’s intent for human relations; He calls it an abomination (Leviticus 18:22; 20:13; Romans 1:27, 28; 1 Corinthians 6:9). God designed that one man and one woman should unite and procreate in the image of God, however, our society is now bringing homosexuality and all related classifications (LGBTQ+) into “normalcy”. But these practices will never be acceptable to our Creator. It is not His will and is in direct violation of His immutable law.

We all struggle in some degree with this particular commandment; we are physically designed to desire companionship. However, as with all physical needs it is our duty to rein in our minds and bodies, dying daily to selfish desires and allowing Christ to live in and through us (Matthew 5:28-30; 1 Corinthians 9:27; 1 Corinthians 15:31; Galatians 2:20).

In Love